Effective communication
August 18, 2014
-Karthik Gurumurthy
I wrote this draft about 2 weeks back but didn't get to post it until today. I have more time now compared to two weeks back.
Anyways, I was able to notice few blunders in communication at work. I am specifically sharing about a person who was running this project. If I had good relationship with the respective person, I would have told the person directly about how it can affect the results and morale. If I share it with the person now, the person might get defensive. I am hoping the person learns soon.
However I am sharing it here so that we all can learn and make sure we don't do the same mistake.
We spend about most of our time in talking to other people. By simply improving our discussions we significantly improve the quality of our lives. There are different ways to make every meeting/discussion better:
Clarity:
If you don’t know what outcome you want to get out of a conversation you will probably be surprised at what you get.
Be clear on what you’re trying to communicate before you start. Clear intentions greatly increase the odds of getting the results desired.
Are you trying to inform? Come up with solutions? share concern? There are as many potentially different outcomes as there are interactions.
The main bottom line from the discussion is : What do I want to have happen as the result of what I say?
Good conversation is about quality, not just quantity. Saying more isn’t necessarily better. Clarity makes you more concise, not more verbose.
Speaking politely/kindly :
"People don't know how much you know until they how much you care."- Dr. John C. Maxwell
A curt reply can kill a good conversation. It suggests that the other person isn’t really interested. Sarcasm and negativity are humiliating and can be a major turn-off. Likewise, speaking rapidly or assertively can come across as harsh.
Results-oriented aggressive people sometimes forget that how a message is delivered largely determines how it is received.
Speak to others with kindness and you are more likely get a positive response.
It doesn’t take any more time to be civil and polite than it does to be direct and harsh. Pay attention to how you say it, not just what you say.
Converse like a friend.
You don’t have to necessarily know a person for long period of time to talk to them like a friend. When you talk like a friend, you are pleasant and upbeat because you value the person you are speaking to. You expect the best from the conversation, and you give your best.
You can talk like a friend to a complete stranger, and he or she will be positively affected by your thoughtfulness. And how often do we take for granted the important people in our lives and make our conversations void of emotion?
A stranger is only a friend you haven’t made yet. When the quality of discussions improves, it helps to productive long lasting relationships making it efficient and effective.
One way to assure your performance is as expected or better is to ask for ongoing feedback. Don’t just inquire about how you’re doing; specifically ask about what you could do different or better to improve your work. The person whom you are asking for feedback would give you their feedback only if they know you are ready to listen.
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