23rd
June 24, 2024
-Karthik Gurumurthy
In the words of Dave Meurer, " A great marriage is not when the 'perfect' couple comes together. It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy the differences."
-Karthik Gurumurthy
In the words of Dave Meurer, " A great marriage is not when the 'perfect' couple comes together. It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy the differences."
-Karthik Gurumurthy
King Midas's story is a Greek legend that powerfully illustrates the danger of getting exactly what we wish for.
In the ancient tale, King Midas was obsessed with accumulating wealth, particularly gold. When granted a wish by the gods, he wished for the power to turn everything he touched into gold - the famous "Midas touch." Initially, this seemed like a dream come true - every object he touched instantly transformed into solid gold, makintg him unimaginably wealthy.
However, the tragic consequences of his wish quickly became apparent:
The story reaches its climax when Midas realizes his "blessing" is actually a curse. He becomes desperate to rid himself of this power, understanding too late that his obsession with wealth had cost him everything that truly mattered in life.
I see modern versions of the Midas touch all around me. Take my friend Alex's father, a successful tech entrepreneur who, like Midas, was obsessed with turning everything into 'gold' - in this case, monetary success. He pushed all his children toward high-paying tech careers, regardless of their interests. Just as Midas discovered the terrible cost of his wish when he turned his daughter into a golden statue, Alex's father realized too late that his singular focus on financial success was turning his relationships with his children cold and lifeless.
The story's wisdom particularly hits home when I think about parenting patterns I've observed. I remember Elika, a student o f mine whose parents were so focused on creating a 'golden' future for her - prestigious college, law school, partner track - that they inadvertently turned every family interaction into a performance review. Like Midas's power, what seemed like a blessing (their resources and connections) became a burden that stifled her authentic self.
What strikes me most about the Midas story is how it exposes the confusion between what we think will make us happy and what actually brings fulfillment. I've experienced this myself when I was so focused on achieving certain professional milestones that I nearly turned my passion into something cold and lifeless - much like Midas's golden touch. It took a personal crisis, my own version of Midas's wake-up call, to realize I was pursuing success at the cost of what truly mattered.
The key lessons I've drawn from this ancient tale feel surprisingly relevant:
These lessons become particularly poignant when I think about how they apply to parenting and mentoring.
I've seen the opposite approach work wonderfully with another family. My colleague Lisa's parents gave their children what I call 'fertile soil' rather than a 'golden touch.' When their son showed interest in becoming a chef instead of joining the family's engineering firm, they supported his passion while ensuring he understood the practical challenges. They provided resources for growth without dictating the direction - more like gardeners than goldsmiths.
I've noticed three critical patterns:
The irony, much like in Midas's story, is that parents and mentors who hold too tightly to their vision of success often end up with exactly what they didn't want - children and mentees who are either rebellious or unfulfilled. The real gold, I've learned, isn't in the outcomes we can control, but in the genuine growth and discovery we can nurture.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Let me share my perspective on how this fear of mistakes plays out, something I've observed closely in our educational and professional circles.
I see it all the time - bright students who are genuinely fascinated by pure sciences, perhaps physics or molecular biology, but end up choosing engineering because it feels like the 'safer' path. I think about my friend Vidya, who loved theoretical physics but opted for computer engineering because, in her words, 'At least I know I'll get a job.' I've seen brilliant minds who light up during chemistry experiments or astronomical discussions, but choose engineering because it's the most-trodden path.
I think about my friend Newman, who spent ten years in corporate finance not because he loved it, but because it felt safe. He had this brilliant idea for a technology startup, but kept saying, 'What if I fail? What if I lose my savings? What if people think I'm foolish?' He was so afraid of making a mistake that he made what I consider the bigger mistake - not trying at all.
I see this pattern play out in subtle ways too. There's my colleague Priya, who excels at creative problem-solving but keeps quiet in meetings because she's afraid of suggesting something 'wrong.' Or my friend Mahesh, who stayed in his hometown because moving to pursue his dreams in a bigger city seemed too uncertain. Each time, the fear of making mistakes becomes a cage that limits our potential.
But here's what I've learned: those who achieve the most remarkable things often have the messiest journeys. Take my friend Alex- he left a prestigious law career to start a tech company, had a lot of hiccups, and then finally succeeded. Each 'mistake' taught him something crucial that contributed to his eventual success. If we refuse to cut ourselves some slack for messing up, then we'll be disinclined to take chances.
The irony is that playing it safe doesn't actually protect us from mistakes - it just limits our potential for growth and discovery. I've started to see that the real mistake isn't failing at something new - it's letting the fear of failure keep us marching along with everybody else, never discovering what might have been possible if we'd dared to step off the beaten path. If we're afraid that the beat of our own drummer might lead us to a misstep, then we can only march along with everybody else.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
I've come to realize that finding your true calling is less like following a GPS and more like exploring an unmarked trail. Take my friend Gikku's journey - he started as an accountant because it seemed logical and secure. Few years in, he felt that nagging emptiness, despite his years of investing in the field.
He first tried working on umpiring, thinking it might fill the creative void. Then he explored sport journalism which led him to realize he loved the sports aspect more than the Journalism part. Each 'detour' wasn't really a detour at all - it was a necessary step in understanding what he truly wanted.
I see this in my own journey too. I spent years in Chemistry, then in Bioinformatics, then program management and coaching. Each role taught me something crucial about what energized me and what drained me. Like my Gikku's experience with accountancy - where he had to fully understand it wasn't his true calling before he could embrace sports journalism - sometimes we need to fully explore and even exhaust certain paths to recognize they're not quite right.
What fascinates me is how our minds work in these strange ways,. We think we should have clear, logical progressions, but often our hearts know things before our minds can explain them. It's like my colleague Sarah, who kept taking art classes while pursuing her PhD in biology. Everyone, including herself, saw it as just a hobby until she realized her true passion was in scientific illustration - a perfect blend of both worlds that she couldn't have planned for.
The process is often complicated by external expectations and internal guilt. A former coworker of mine had a prestigious law degree but found himself drawn to opening a small bakery. The hardest part wasn't learning the new skills - it was giving herself permission to want something different from what he'd invested years preparing for.
What I've learned is that this messiness is not just normal - it's necessary. Each 'failed' attempt, each pivot, each moment of doubt contributes to our understanding of ourselves. I've noticed that true calling often reveals itself in those small moments of lost time - when you're so engaged that hours feel like minutes. Like when you're breaking down the periodic table into a story that makes students' eyes light up with understanding, or when you find yourself sketching molecular structures on napkins at dinner because you're excited about making a complex concept clearer.When we finally find our true calling, it often comes with that unmistakable feeling of both responsibility and joy - a gravity that holds us in place not through obligation, but through genuine alignment with who we are.
The key is to stay open to these seemingly random explorations while paying attention to what truly resonates. Sometimes our calling finds us while we're busy looking somewhere else.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
I've been reflecting deeply on what privilege truly means, and it's fascinating how it goes far beyond just material comfort. While having a comfortable home, good food, and financial security is important, I've come to understand that the real essence of privilege lies in having choices - the freedom to explore different paths in life.
This reminds me of two contrasting stories that really illuminate this idea. First, there's my friend Charu, who comes from a well-to-do family and attended an elite university. On paper, she had everything - financial security, excellent education, and clear career paths laid out before her. But her privilege paradoxically became a constraint because her family had such rigid expectations about what constituted an 'acceptable' career. They'd given her a universe of possibilities with one hand while taking most of them away with the other, pushing her toward traditional prestigious professions like law or medicine, regardless of her own interests.
Then there's this other story that really resonates with me - about someone who took a wonderfully meandering path to find their calling. They started in mechanical engineering, then followed their curiosity through physics, mathematics, fine arts, and finally to architecture. What strikes me is how each shift wasn't a failure but a necessary step in their journey. Despite their parents' anxiety and friends' confusion, each change brought them closer to understanding what they truly wanted.
This journey particularly speaks to me because I've seen similar patterns in my own life and those of others around me. I have a cousin who started in Commerce, switched to psychology, and eventually found his passion in Marine Management . At each step, he was told she was 'wasting' his opportunities, but really, he was using his privilege exactly as it should be used - as the freedom to explore and find his authentic path.
The real insight for me is that true privilege isn't just about having opportunities - it's about having the freedom to explore them without being constrained by others' expectations or rigid definitions of success. It's like having a map with multiple possible routes rather than being forced down a single predetermined path.
This makes me think about how we often mistake 'the right choice' for 'the safe choice' or 'the obvious choice.' Real privilege is having the courage and support to wander through that labyrinth of choices until you find what truly resonates with you, even if that path looks messy or unconventional to others.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
I've been reflecting deeply on this parenting philosophy of giving children 'enough to do anything, but not enough to do nothing.' It's like providing a robust launching pad while ensuring they still need to build their own rocket.
I see this in how my friend Priya parents her children. She pays for their college education - giving them the freedom to pursue their dreams without crippling debt - but expects them to work part-time jobs for their personal expenses. This teaches them both the value of education and the importance of work ethic. The 'enough to do anything' is the education; the 'not enough to do nothing' is the responsibility for their own spending money.
Another example that really strikes me is how my colleague Dylan handles his family business. Instead of simply handing his daughter a executive position, he first required her to work elsewhere for five years. He gave her 'enough' by providing the opportunity to eventually join the family business, but not 'enough to do nothing' by making her prove herself in the outside world first. She had to earn her way back in, bringing fresh perspectives and proven capabilities.
I've also observed this principle in smaller, everyday situations. Like my friend Visu who helps his son with a down payment for a house but expects him to qualify for and pay the mortgage himself. Or another family I know who funded their children's graduate school but only after they'd worked for two years and could articulate exactly why they needed the advanced degree.
What fascinates me is how this approach creates a perfect balance between support and challenge. It's like installing training wheels but making sure they come off at the right time. Too many training wheels for too long, and the child never learns true balance. Remove them too early, and you risk unnecessary falls and lost confidence.
I've noticed that families who practice this principle tend to raise children who are both confident in their abilities and realistic about life's challenges. They understand that while they may have advantages, those advantages are tools to build with, not cushions to rest on. They learn that privilege comes with responsibility, and opportunity must be matched with effort.
This balance seems particularly crucial in today's world, where we're trying to prepare children for careers and challenges that might not even exist yet. The goal isn't to give them everything, but to give them just enough to develop the capabilities to figure things out for themselves.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Lot of people think of luck as an opportunity that lands in our lap - but what we do with that opportunity is what truly matters.
For example, someone gets introduced to an influential person at a random networking event (initial luck). They could either let that connection fade, or they could follow up thoughtfully, provide value to that relationship, and turn it into a meaningful professional partnership. Those who "earn" this luck often send relevant articles to their new contact, offer to help with projects, and maintain genuine communication.
Another example is receiving an unexpected job interview through a friend's recommendation. The initial luck is getting the interview, but earning it means thoroughly preparing for the interview, researching the company extensively, and then working diligently once hired to prove the recommendation was warranted.
Think of a musician who gets a viral moment on social media. That's the initial luck - but turning that viral moment into a sustainable career requires consistent content creation, engaging with fans, and continuously improving their craft. Many viral sensations fade away, while others "earn" their lucky break through dedication.
There's also everyday luck, like having good health. We can earn this luck by maintaining healthy habits, regular exercise, and proper nutrition - or we can take it for granted and potentially lose it.
The key principle is that initial luck opens a door, but it's our subsequent actions that determine whether we walk through that door and make something meaningful of the opportunity. This perspective invites me to ask myself: How am I honoring the advantages I've been given? Am I using my own "grace" - whatever form it takes - to create value for others? It's not about feeling guilty for our advantages or resentful of our disadvantages, but about recognizing that the true measure of our worth lies in what we do with whatever circumstances we've been given.
Even in everyday situations - maybe you stumbled upon a useful professional connection through a chance meeting. Humility is understanding "I didn't strategically orchestrate this meeting - it was random luck." But action is following through, being reliable, adding value to the relationship, and building something meaningful from that initial lucky encounter.
The power lies in this dual recognition: we can simultaneously acknowledge the role of chance in our lives (keeping us humble) while also taking full responsibility for what we do with our circumstances (spurring us to action). It's about saying "I may not have chosen my starting point, but I can choose what I do from here."
-Karthik Gurumurthy
I'm struck by the deep wisdom about life's fundamental randomness and what we make of it. By Life's fundamental randomness, I mean the inherent unpredictability and chance elements that shape our existence - where and when we're born, the opportunities or challenges that unexpectedly arise, the people we happen to meet, and countless other factors outside our control.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Let me tell you about Shoba, a seasoned public speaker who discovered three magical secrets about transforming time. It all started when she was preparing for what seemed like just another corporate presentation.
Staring at her blank slides one evening, Shoba caught herself asking that age-old question: "How am I going to fill these 60 minutes?" Then it hit her - she was asking the wrong question entirely. It wasn't about filling time; it was about filling minds. She remembered watching her favorite teacher in school, who never seemed concerned about the clock but instead focused on lighting up eyes with understanding.
But Shoba's story doesn't stop there. One day, stuck in a two-hour flight delay, she noticed something fascinating. While everyone around her was mindlessly scrolling through their phones, muttering about "killing time," an elderly gentleman next to her was writing heartfelt letters to his grandchildren. "I'm not killing time," he told her with a twinkle in his eye, "I'm mining it for gold."
The final piece of Shoba's time transformation clicked into place after a particularly chaotic week. She'd been beating herself up about "making up for lost time" when her wise friend Sofia stopped her in her tracks.
"Lost time?" Sofia asked, raising an eyebrow. "Tell me, Shoba, can you change what happened yesterday?"
"No," Shoba admitted.
"Can you control what happens tomorrow?"
"No..."
"Then why waste today worrying about either?"
From these experiences, Shoba learned three powerful lessons about transforming time:
Now, whenever Shoba speaks, trains, or even just waits in line at the coffee shop, she remembers these lessons. She's become something of a time alchemist, turning ordinary moments into golden opportunities for growth, connection, and purpose.
And here's the best part - she discovered that when you treat each moment as precious, you never really waste time at all. You just keep transforming it into something better.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Hey, let's get real about New Year's resolutions - they usually crash and burn faster than a TikTok trend! Instead of saying "I'm gonna lose 10 pounds" (and giving up by February), let's talk about building habits that actually stick.
Think of it like building a house: you don't just throw up the walls and hope for the best. You need a solid foundation. Here are some game-changing habits that actually work:
The Secret Sauce? Don't Try to Change Everything at Once: It's like trying to juggle while riding a unicycle - you're gonna fall! Start small. Maybe begin with one habit, like reading for 10 minutes before bed. Once that's solid, add another.
And here's the real talk: Your willpower is like a phone battery - it runs out! That's why you might crush your healthy eating goals all day but demolish a bag of chips at night. When this happens (and it will), don't beat yourself up. Just recharge and start fresh.
Remember: The goal isn't to become perfect - it's to become better. As they say, Rome wasn't built in a day, but they were laying bricks every hour. What brick are you going to lay today?
-Karthik Gurumurthy
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Hey, want to unlock your hidden superpowers? Here's the deal: we've all got this massive reservoir of potential just waiting to be tapped into. Let me break down some cool ways to make that happen!
-Karthik Gurumurthy
I just read a heartwarming story in Times of India about learning to let go! So this retired Indian Air Force veteran had accumulated quite the collection over the years - we're talking eight different uniforms, six types of shoes, and enough headgear to start a hat shop! His first big decluttering win? Making his wife super happy by emptying out his wardrobe.
Then came the really tricky stuff. Moving from a 4-bedroom house to a 3-bedroom apartment meant he had to part with all kinds of things, from kitchen stuff to curtains. The toughest part? His massive collection of books and magazines - we're talking hundreds of Reader's Digests and National Geographic! (That would give Marie Kondo a run for her money!)
But wait, it gets more touching. After his wife passed away, he cleared out her cupboards in just three days, donating everything to orphanages and hospitals. Though he admits his heart skipped a beat seeing her empty cupboard the next day. Now whenever his son asks for something, he sweetly says, "It's in your mama's cupboard."
The final decluttering mission came after his cancer surgeries, when he decided to embrace the simple life. He's now down to just eight sets of basics and five pairs of PJs in his travel bag. But here's the catch - he ends his story wondering if he can declutter his memories as easily as his possessions. Pretty deep, right?
Best part? He's still writing and sharing his story, showing us all that sometimes having less stuff actually gives you more life. How's that for inspiration to clean out our own closets?
-Karthik Gurumurthy
As I sit here on this crisp December morning of 2024, watching the sun peek through my window, I can't help but reflect on the incredible journey that brought me here. You know, life has this funny way of teaching us lessons when we least expect them, and over the years, I've collected quite a few pearls of wisdom that I'd love to share with you.
Picture this: We're all like unique snowflakes drifting through life. Even identical twins, believe it or not, chart their own distinct paths. It took me years to realize that comparing myself to others was like comparing apples to shooting stars – completely pointless! As my friend Robert would say, "Don't strive to be the best; strive to be the only you."
Speaking of journeys, I've started keeping this fascinating little habit. Every evening, I jot down my daily victories in what I call my "celebration journal." It could be something as simple as dragging myself out of bed for an early morning workout or my failing student excited about a new concept. You'd be amazed at how these little wins add up! It's like building a personal highlight reel of your life.
But here's something that might surprise you: being a jack-of-all-trades isn't such a bad thing after all. Take Roger Federer, for instance. Did you know that as a kid, he just wanted to meet Boris Becker and maybe win six grand slams? He wasn't obsessed with being the GOAT like Tiger Woods was. Life has taught me that having multiple interests and skills is like having different arrows in your quiver – you never know which one you'll need to hit your target.
Your environment, oh boy, that's a game-changer! Think of it like being a plant – you need the right soil, sunlight, and water to thrive. I've learned to surround myself with beauty, tranquility, and inspiration. It's amazing how some inspiring books can transform your mental landscape.
Time management? Forget about it! Instead, I've learned to manage myself. It's like being the conductor of your own orchestra – you need to know which instruments (tasks) to play at what time. I've become quite good at saying "no" to the trivial many to focus on the vital few. It's liberating, really.
Let me tell you about this turning point in my life back in 2012. I sat down and wrote what I call my personal mission statement: "My mission is to maximize my potential and help others maximize theirs." Simple, right? But it's been my North Star ever since. It's like having a personal GPS for life's journey.
You know what's funny? We often forget to celebrate how far we've come. We're so busy looking at the mountain ahead that we forget to look back at the valley we've already crossed.
Here's a secret I've learned: success isn't about what others think it should be. It's about what makes your heart sing. I've seen people with all the fame and fortune in the world who still feel empty inside. True success is like a perfectly tailored suit – it needs to fit YOU, not anyone else.
But perhaps the most important lesson I've learned is about love – love for life, love for others, and love for ourselves. Life isn't a dress rehearsal; we get one shot at this magnificent performance. The most touching reflections I've heard from elderly folks aren't about career achievements or material success – they're about wishing they'd spent more time with the people they love.
And gratitude? That's the secret sauce that ties everything together. It's like having a pair of magical glasses that help you see the beauty in every moment, even the challenging ones. Just yesterday, I challenged myself to write down 30 things I'm grateful for. You know what? The first 20 were easy, but pushing beyond that really made me appreciate the little things I often take for granted.
As we venture into 2025, I carry these lessons with me like precious stones in my pocket, each one polished by experience and time. They remind me that life isn't about reaching a destination – it's about enjoying the dance, learning from the missteps, and keeping our hearts open to the wonderful possibilities that each new day brings.
Remember, your story is still being written, and you're holding the pen. Make it a story worth telling.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
I have started seeing everything differently. You know how when you're about to go on a long trip, you get choosier about what really needs your attention? That's how I live now. When I catch myself getting worked up about small stuff, I think "Will this matter in my final moments?" Usually, the answer's no.
Here's a practical example - Few years back, I used to stress about keeping up with the Joneses, always wanting the newest gadgets or a fancier car. Now I focus more on collecting moments than things. Last week, instead of upgrading my phone, I spent that money taking my family out for a day we'll actually remember.
I've also gotten better at what I call "cleaning as I go" - not just physical stuff, but emotional baggage too. I try not to let the sun set on anger or unresolved issues. If I have a disagreement with someone, I handle it pretty quickly now. Because honestly, who wants their last interaction with someone to be a petty argument?
The funny thing is, planning for a good ending has made me better at living. I'm more intentional about telling people what they mean to me - no saving it for eulogies. When my friend did something really thoughtful last month, I didn't just think "that's nice" - I called him up and told him how much I appreciated it.
This mindset has also made me weirdly more adventurous. Since I'm not pretending I'll live forever, I'm less likely to put things off. Want to learn a new thing? Why not? Go for it. The clock's ticking, but that makes every minute more valuable, not less.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Ever notice how some people live like they're always getting ready for their "real life" to start? Like that friend who's always saying "I'll start traveling once I get a better job" or "I'll learn guitar after I retire." Meanwhile, time's just zipping by like a Netflix series on autoplay!
Here's the deal: time is like having a gift card with no balance display - you don't know how much you've got left, which makes every bit of it super precious. Pretty heavy stuff, right? But here's a cool way to think about it: death is like the sun - it affects everything we do, but you don't want to stare directly at it or you'll go nuts!
Think about when you're most excited about stuff:
The ancient philosophers weren't being dramatic when they thought about death - they were just trying to live life in "HD" instead of standard definition! They were like, "If you want to really appreciate your Monday, pretend it's your last Monday ever."
It's like when you're at the end of your vacation - suddenly every moment feels more special, right? That's the kind of awareness they were after for everyday life.
And here's the really cool part: what sticks around after we're gone isn't our Instagram posts or fancy job titles - it's the impact we had on others. Think about it like this: your grandma's special recipe, your dad's cricket annotations , your teacher's life advice - that stuff becomes part of who you are, and then part of who your kids become.
So instead of living like you're always in the waiting room for your real life to sart, live like you're already in the main event. Because, plot twist: you are!
Bottom line? Don't put off telling people you love them, taking that trip, or learning that thing you've always wanted to learn. The time is now, folks!
-Karthik Gurumurthy
-Karthik Gurumurthy
-Karthik Gurumurthy
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Hey there! Let's talk about something real - you know that quiet change that comes with getting older? It's kind of like watching the seasons change, but it's happening to you. 🍂
At 40, it hits you - things are different. You know those meetings where everyone used to hang on your every word? Now they're buzzing along without asking what you think. But here's the thing - it's not personal! It's just life doing its thing. The cool part? Your real impact isn't in today's meeting - it's in all those lives you've touched along the way.
By 45, you get this "aha" moment about work. That corporate world you thought couldn't survive without you? Spoiler alert: it keeps spinning! And you know what? That's actually awesome! It's like finally taking off those uncomfortable shoes you've been wearing all day. Now you can focus on the good stuff - sharing what you know, helping others grow. Because let's face it, inspiring someone else is way cooler than any fancy job title.
At 50, it's like society's playing this game of "let's pretend older folks are invisible." But hey, plot twist - it's actually kind of freeing! The younger crowd doesn't know you were once the boss of everything, and that's actually perfect. You can just be... you. No pressure, no pretending. And those old friends who still call just to check in? They're like gold, seriously. Pure gold. ✨
And when it's finally time to peace out? It's all good! It's just the last chapter of an amazing story - your story. Full of laughs, tears, and everything in between.
So here's the deal: while you're still kicking, live it up! Laugh so hard you snort, hug people like you mean it, do that thing you've been putting off. Treat your friendships like precious plants - give them attention, watch them grow. Because when the credits roll, nobody's going to remember your job title or your bank balance. They'll remember how you made them feel.
Just keep spreading those good vibes, be present, and boom - you're basically immortal!
This one goes out to everyone who gets it - time doesn't erase the awesome stuff, it just turns it into something new.
PS: Getting older isn't about fading away - it's about glowing differently. And honestly? It looks pretty good on you! 💫
-Karthik Gurumurthy
I just enjoyed reading the HBR article of "When your Team Bypasses you to get things done" by Jenny Fernandez. This is the gist of what was shared.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
You know what's cool about saying "thank you"? It's like putting on special glasses that help you spot all the good stuff in your life - things you might totally miss otherwise because you're too busy or stressed to notice. Plus, when you thank someone, it's this awesome reminder that you're not flying solo in life. We're all connected!
Now, let's talk about holding grudges - there's this super smart quote from the Talmud that basically says holding a grudge is as dumb as cutting one hand with a knife and then stabbing your other hand for revenge. Like, who are you really hurting here?
When someone hurts you, yeah, that pain is real - no one's saying it isn't. It's like getting a real cut - you can't just pretend it doesn't hurt. But here's the thing: holding onto that pain is like choosing to cut yourself over and over again. Ouch!
Think of forgiveness like gratitude's cousin - it's something you do for others, but really, you're the one who benefits most. There's this great way of looking at it: forgiving means giving up hope for a better past. Because let's be real - you can't change what happened yesterday, but you've got total control over what you do today and tomorrow.
Bottom line? Strong people know where to focus their energy. They know they can't control the past, but they sure can control how they handle it going forward!
-Karthik Gurumurthy
You know what's crazy cool? Being human! And I'm not talking about all the stuff we haven't done yet or what's missing in our lives. It's about celebrating who we are and the wild fact that we can become whoever we want to be.
Think about it - nobody's controlling your path or writing your story for you. You get to choose! How awesome is that? It's like having this superpower to transform yourself, letting go of yesterday's baggage and making each day a little better than the last. And once you get into that groove, it becomes second nature - like leveling up in a video game, but in real life!
But here's the thing - it's not about reaching some final destination. The fun is in playing the game! It's like sports - it's not just about winning, it's about that next serve, that next shot, that next strategic move. Every time you think you've hit your peak, your heart's beating fast because you know there's more to come.
Nothing in this world stays the same - everything keeps evolving. We haven't found the world's best idea yet because there's always a better one coming. Think about music: you could be the greatest musician ever, but there's always a new tune waiting to be discovered. Even the pros who've composed thousands of songs can sit down at their keyboard and create something totally new from the same basic notes.
It's like product development - maybe you just need to tweak one ingredient, change the packaging, or adjust the lighting to make something good even better. And that's the beauty of being human - if we can improve everything around us, then we can definitely improve ourselves too!
So whether you're already at the top of your game or just starting out, there's always room to grow, learn, and surprise yourself. That's the real magic of being human - knowing that even when you're crushing it, there's still something new and exciting waiting around the corner. How cool is that?
-Karthik Gurumurthy
I've found that being real about it actually helps. Like, yes, death is part of the package deal of being alive - kind of like how seasons change. Once I started thinking about it that way, it got less scary. It's like what Socrates said (in a way less stuffy version): we're kind of silly to fear something we don't even understand.
I've learned that planning for a peaceful exit is just as important as planning for retirement. It's kind of funny - we spend so much time planning vacations or career moves, but we shy away from planning our final chapter. Like that beautiful quote from Elizabeth Kübler-Ross says, we're all just like falling stars, shining bright for our moment.
Yeah, it's not the most fun topic, but accepting that we're not here forever helps us live better now. I try to make each day count by doing something meaningful - whether it's helping others or just spreading a bit of joy. I try to live in the now. I've also discovered that keeping busy with stuff that matters really helps.
The biggest game-changer? Understanding that love outlasts everything. Those connections we make, the memories we create - that stuff sticks around. Like that philosopher said - death might be strong, but love's stronger. It can't take away the good stuff we leave behind.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
You know, we tend to avoid talking about death like it's some kind of taboo subject. I get it - it's heavy stuff. But I've learned some interesting things about facing it, especially from this amazing story about Ramana Maharshi, who had this wild experience when he was just 16.
Picture this: Here's this regular teenager, sitting in his uncle's house, when suddenly he gets hit with this overwhelming fear of death. Instead of freaking out and running to someone else, he does something pretty remarkable - he decides to face it head-on. It's like when you're afraid of something and decide to look it straight in the eye.
Here's what works for me when thinking about death:
I try this morning practice sometimes - kind of like a thought experiment. I find a quiet moment, usually early morning when everything's peaceful, and just sit with some real questions: "What would happen to my family? Have I taken care of everything they'd need? What would I want to say to them?" Sure, it's scary at first, but it actually helps make peace with the whole idea.
There's this big difference I've noticed between running from death and accepting it as part of life. Like in Jain tradition, they have this practice called Sallekhana - it's not about giving up on life, but about making peace with its natural end. It's kind of like preparing for a journey you know you'll take someday, but without obsessing over it.
The most practical thing I've learned? Live fully now. I used to waste time worrying about stuff I couldn't control. These days, I focus more on creating good memories with my family, picking up new hobbies, helping others where I can. I've found that when you're really living, the fear of death naturally takes a backseat.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
As I go through my daily routine, I sometimes catch myself feeling a bit restless. Every morning, I follow the same pattern - I get up, I grade my students work, tackle the housework, start work, prepare for classes, take care of everyone else's needs, the usual chores, and finally climb into bed. Then I wake up and do it all over again.
At first glance, this repetitive cycle might seem dull. I used to focus on how each day mirrors the last, wondering if I was missing out on something more exciting. But lately, I've started to see things differently.
When I lay my head on my pillow at night, peacefully planning what to plan for tomorrow, I realize something profound: this simple act of calm planning is a luxury many people will never experience. Think of the people in Ukraine, or Gaza. They go to bed worried about basic survival, uncertain about tomorrow, or facing serious crisis. But here I am, with the beautiful privilege of thinking about planning my day choices.
My "boring" life, I've come to understand, is actually a remarkable blessing. The predictability I once questioned is now something I cherish. Each routine task - from the morning alarm to the evening bedtime - represents stability, security, and peace. The fact that I can expect tomorrow to be similar to today isn't a limitation; it's a gift.
In this world that can be so harsh and unpredictable, I've actually won life's lottery. My ordinary, consistent home life isn't boring at all - it's a sanctuary of peace that many people dream of having. And for that, I'm deeply grateful.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
You know how we often look at superstars like Joe Root consistently scoring centuries in Tests on the cricket field, Novak Djokovic dominating tennis, or Elon Musk revolutionizing industries, and think, "Man, they're just naturally gifted"? Well, here's the fascinating truth: it's not just about being born lucky or talented.
There was this brilliant researcher named Anders Ericsson who discovered something amazing - it typically takes about 10 years or 10,000 hours of what he called "deliberate practice" to become truly exceptional at something. Malcolm Gladwell actually wrote about this in his book "Outliers," showing how this pattern keeps popping up among top performers. Though it's not just about hitting that magic number - there are other factors too.
But here's why this is such great news: it means success isn't some exclusive club for the naturally gifted! Think about it - we're living in an age where we have more access to information than ever before. Our grandparents would have given anything for the resources we can access with just a few clicks!
Want to know what this "deliberate practice" looks like in real life? Take Michael Phelps' story - it'll blow your mind. While other swimmers were taking it easy after the Olympics, this guy was still grinding away in the pool. He pushed himself so hard in practice that his goggles would sometimes break! There's this amazing moment where his goggles filled with water during an Olympic race, but because he'd practiced so intensely - even in the worst conditions - he didn't panic. He just thought, "I've been here before," and kept swimming.
Or take Michael Jordan - instead of obsessing over what his competitors were doing, he focused on being so good that they had to worry about him! As his trainer Tim Grover put it, Jordan didn't study the competition - he made the competition study him.
The secret sauce? It's about consistently working on getting better at what matters most in your field. This could mean dedicating time each day to reading up on your industry, soaking up knowledge from podcasts, finding mentors who've been there and done that, getting those important certifications, and sharing what you learn with others. It's like building a muscle - you've got to keep at it regularly to see results.
Remember this: those moments of hard work when nobody's watching? That's what transforms you from good to great. As Phelps said, "It's what you do in the dark that brings you to light."
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Let me tell you about this tiny but super fancy country that's like Europe's hidden gem! Luxembourg is like if a medieval castle and a modern bank tower had a really successful baby! 🏰
Cool stuff about Luxembourg:
Fun facts that'll surprise you:
Must-do stuff:
Pro tips:
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Quarten is this ridiculously picturesque little village tucked away in the Swiss canton of St. Gallen, perched above the Walensee lake.
Picture this: stunning mountain views, crystal-clear lake waters, and those classic Swiss chalets that look like they jumped straight out of a chocolate box cover! It's one of those places where you can literally hear cowbells tinkling in the distance (no joke!).
Now, about those Swiss trains - they're basically like luxury sightseeing tours that happen to get you places! 😍
The coolest part about Swiss trains:
Famous routes you shouldn't miss:
Pro tips for Swiss train travel:
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Let me tell you about Postojna Cave - it's like Mother Nature decided to create her own underground palace! 🗺️
Picture this: you hop on this cool mini train (yes, an actual train INSIDE a cave!) that takes you deep into this massive underground wonderland that's been wowing visitors for 200 years. The cave system is so huge it could fit like 6 Eiffel Towers stacked on top of each other!
Inside, it's like walking through the most epic natural art gallery ever. You've got these incredible stalagmites and stalactites everywhere (those are the pointy rock things going up and down - I always remember stalactites hold "tight" to the ceiling!). Some look like curtains made of stone, others like delicate spaghetti, and some are massive columns that took literally millions of years to form. One drop of water at a time, can you believe it?
The star of the show is this amazing five-meter tall bright white stalagmite called 'Brilliant' - and trust me, it lives up to its name! And don't even get me started on the baby dragons (okay, they're actually called olms - these weird, pink, blind salamanders that live in the cave's waters and can go without food for YEARS 🐉).
Recommendations:
Want to feel like a proper explorer? They've got special tours where you can go off the tourist track and into the cave's wild parts. Just maybe don't try to take a baby dragon home as a souvenir!
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Let me tell you about the wildest, most colorful building in Vienna that looks like a kid's crayon drawing came to life! 🎨
Picture this: You're walking through proper, elegant Vienna with all its fancy classical buildings, when BAM! - you stumble upon what looks like a building that Dr. Seuss and Willy Wonka designed together after having too much coffee. That's Hundertwasserhaus!
Friedensreich Hundertwasser (try saying that three times fast!) was this amazing Austrian artist who absolutely HATED straight lines. He was like, "Nature doesn't do straight lines, so why should buildings?" So he created this apartment building where every window is different, floors are wavy like you're on a fun-house ride, and there are trees growing out of the rooms - yes, actual trees coming right out of the windows! 🌳
The whole place is a riot of colors - bright yellows, blues, reds, and golds, with mosaic pillars that look like they're wearing party hats. The roof is covered in grass and gardens (talk about green architecture before it was cool!), and there are these gorgeous golden onion domes that make the whole thing look like some magical fairy tale castle.
Fun stuff to know:
Tips: You can't go inside the actual apartment building (because, you know, people live there), but right across the street is the Hundertwasser Village where you can get your fix of crazy architecture AND do some shopping!
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Let's remove the "what ifs" and "buts" from our thoughts and words....three things we need to remind ourselves if we want a vibrational existence:
Pray and let go and they will be answered.
Your energy matters.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
The Franklin D. Roosevelt statue was a gift from the people of Oslo to honor FDR's support for Norway during World War II. Here's the heartwarming backstory:
During WWII, after Nazi Germany invaded Norway in 1940, Roosevelt was super supportive of Norway's struggle and their government-in-exile. He was like that awesome friend who has your back when times are tough! FDR made sure Norway got access to supplies and military aid through the Lend-Lease program, which was huge for the Norwegian resistance movement.
The statue was unveiled in 1950 in front of City Hall.
Fun fact: Crown Princess Martha of Norway actually lived in the US during the war years and was good friends with the Roosevelts! This personal connection helped strengthen the bonds between the two countries.
The coolest part? The statue shows Roosevelt sitting down (which was rare for statues back then) to acknowledge his physical challenges with polio while highlighting his strength as a leader. It's like Oslo wanted to show that what matters isn't whether you can stand, but whether you stand up for what's right!
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Think of knowledge like borrowed books - you didn't write them, you just collect them. The moment you realize this, pride melts away. The truly wise understand they're just tiny dots in this vast universe, holding a few drops from an endless ocean of knowledge.
Life's like a short-term rental - we're all temporary residents here. Instead of puffing up with pride about our little collections, why not enjoy this brief stay peacefully? The more you learn, the more you realize how much you don't know. And that's okay - it's what keeps us curious and humble.
Remember: Those who brag about climbing mountains often slip on pebbles. True wisdom whispers; it doesn't shout.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Work is effective management of resourcers in a certain order to achieve a specific, functional objective. While all of the resources of our life are God's gift unto us, the work we create out of all of these resources is actually our creation. Let our prayer be, "Oh Lord, all the work I do is my creation of your resources. All thework I do from now on will be my offering onto you. Everything I do in my life will be my gift, and is an expression of gratitude onto you.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Jackie Chan responded to a journalist's question about whether he is satisfied with his life with these wise words:
"You know, I once heard very wise words:
Your hard work is the dream of every unemployed person;
Your restless child is the dream of everyone without children;
Your small home is the dream of every homeless person;
Your little capital is the dream of every debtor;
Your poor health is the dream of every patient with an incurable disease;
Your peace, your peaceful sleep, your accessible food is the dream of everyone in a country at war.
You must appreciate everything you have. After all, no one knows what tomorrow will bring."
We should be appreciative for everything that we do have and never lose sight of that.
We should always practice positivity—-believe that anything is possible and always carry a positive and hopeful attitude.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
" Remove expectations from people and you'll remove their power to hurt your feelings."
Based in Kennington, The Kia Oval has been the home of Surrey Cricket Club since 1845, a stadium iconic the world over for its history and unique gas-holders that have overlooked every game played at the ground since 1853. Oval has also staged International cricket since 1880 and was the ground where the Ashes were born in 1882.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Water does not resist. Water flows. When you plunge your hand into it, all you feel is a caress. Water is not a solid wall, it will not stop you. But water always goes where it wants to go, and nothing in the end can stand against it. Water is patient. Dripping water wears away a stone. Remember that, my child. Remember you are half water. If you can’t go through an obstacle, go around it. Water does. ~Margaret Atwood
We are actually 70% water."Be water, my friend!" says Bruce Lee
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Little nuggets of wisdom can be found all around us if we keep our eyes and ears open to the possibility. Roger that!
The main take aways from Roger Federer’s commencement speech are:
i. Effortless is a myth:
Talent matters but talent has a broad definition. Most of the time it’s not about having a gift but having grit. Discipline, trust and patience are talents. Embracing the process is talent. Managing your life is a talent. Developing and working on these abilities is key to success.
ii. It’s only a point:
The best in the world know they lose again and again and have learned to deal with it. You move on, be relentless, adapt and grow.
iii. Life is bigger than the court.
Life like tennis is a team sport. Your success depends on your team, your family, your friends, your rivals. These influences shape you in who you are and to become the best version of you.
iv. He won 54% of all the points he played, yet he won 80% of all the matches he played!
v. Even a small, but consistent, performance edge at a micro-scale integrates to a much bigger macro-scale advantage over a period of time.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
It feels like there is never enough time in the day to achieve everything we want to. Work, family, the daily rituals of life, getting through a to-do list sometimes seems impossible. We're living during a time when most people around the world glorify productivity. Being busy is almost considered a virtue, but it's worth asking ourselves why this is and how we can overcome it. There are a couple of problems with this excuse. The first is that we do make time for things that are important to us. Actually, it's a really interesting test of your personal values to see what you spend time on. Another problem is that we are often more engaged in meaningless actions instead of productive activity. Productivity and time management research demonstrates that we spend a significant amount of time answering emails that are reactive and less time in deep work or working without distraction on creating something, depending on your field of work, that could mean writing, connecting with clients etc.
Creating habits is more than just being motivated to do so, it requires discipline. I have a good friend who is an executive coach and business school professor who always reminds people that motivation is just one part of the equation. Discipline is key to building sustainable habits. Discipline really means a sustainable plan of action for you. Have you ever gone to a seminar or workshop and been so inspired to change your behavior at work only to have that wane once you get back because of the regular cadence of your job? That's because you needed a plan. A plan to build habits and I'm going to suggest four key things to help with this plan. Develop a regular practice for reflection and learning. Be prepared to fall off the wagon. Connect with others, and know your purpose. How can we build commitment in a way that is sustainable?
Number 1, have a regular practice for reflection and learning. Are you familiar with the scientific method? Scientists develop hypotheses, design experiments to test these hypotheses, evaluate the results, and then make adjustments to their hypotheses and complete the whole process over and over again. This is how scientists learn and actually it's how adults learn too. Models of adult learning suggest that the way we absorb and integrate new knowledge is that we take in new information, we test it out, we evaluate the results and we adjust. In this context, we can think of creating a meaningful plan as engaging in the scientific method, we need a regular, consistent and easy way to follow experimentation and learning. Learning is hard. What I find is helpful for reflection is to structure it. I typically think about reflection in four steps.
The first thing I'm trying to do as I reflect on something is to identify some if-then cause-effect relationship. When I look back at this meeting, or I look back at this project or I look back at this situation or events or whatever, I want to digest my feelings. I want to see if I miss something, all that. But then I want to, at the end of that, see if I can pull away some generalization, some lesson for myself. Then what I want to do is provide the argument for why I believe that lesson. If I think in this situation that instead of talking, I should've listened. Why? What's the outcome that would have produced? Listening more makes people trust me more. There's a potential generalization. Why do I believe that might be so? What's the argument for that? If I was going to try to convince my colleague to listen more in order to foster trust. What would I say to make them believe that to be true? What happened in this experience that led me to believe that? Is there anything else in my life that makes me think that's a good lesson? What's the lesson? Identify not just moods, feelings, etc. But what's the lesson and then what's the argument for that lesson?
Then the next step is what I think of as complexities. What are the boundary conditions, when might be hard to do this, when might it not work? There are always limitations. Nothing is always true. Things are usually true, often true, or sometimes true, true under some conditions. What are the conditions under which this lesson holds?
Then the last one is implementation. What am I going to do differently now that I appreciate this lesson? What is the behavior practice saying? What am I going to do differently so that I remember to use this lesson rather than forget about it? When I think about reflection, what's the lesson? What's the argument for the lesson? What are the limitations? What am I going to do to make use of this rather than leave this behind and forget about it? The second is to be prepared to fall off the wagon and have a plan. Part of the reason this is so interesting to me is because I have always been really good at setting a great big goal, getting excited about it, breaking it down into daily goals. Then I miss one's day, maybe I wasn't feeling well or I was preoccupied, or whatever. I think well, missed that day might as well give up. We actually need to have a practice for what happens when we aren't achieving our smaller goals. Is it because we didn't set the right goal to begin with? Maybe we need to course correct or did we simply have a bad day and we need to forgive ourselves and think about tomorrow as a fresh start?
Research on fresh starts show that they do matter. They matter for motivation and commitment to our goals. Decide whether your practice needs to change or if you just needed a break, either way, you can keep going. The third is to connect with others. You might have heard it said that if you share your goals with others, you're more likely to achieve them. This is true. Making a commitment to others holds us accountable. It's why gym buddies are such a good idea. It's easy to skip the gym if it's just you. It's harder to tell your friend who's already in the car and headed to the gym that you're going to leave her hanging. Growing as a leader is an individual journey, but it is not an isolated one. Other people are on leadership growth plans of their own and creating these connections can be so helpful. When I was completing my leadership coach training, I found that my commitment to my own practice of leadership growth felt like it took off because I had this group of like-minded people to talk to, share ideas with, and to go to for advice. The fourth is keep the big picture in mind. What is your purpose? Don't get scared by the word purpose. I don't mean you have to write a treatise on your reason for existence. I simply mean know why you're interested in developing as a leader. Why is this journey important to you? What are you hoping to accomplish throughout it? Why is a powerful concept and having that big picture goal in mind can be a powerful way to help us stay committed to our daily exercises. Growing as a leader requires commitment. That means we have to build sustainable habits that will help us stay on track while we grow, create a practice for experimentation and reflection, course correct and use a fresh start when you course correct. Connect with others who want to grow as leaders and know your why for choosing to focus on your own leadership growth.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
To wanderlust's insistent call, a traveler takes heed,
Beyond the map, a world enthrall, a tapestry to read.
New lands unfurl, with sights unseen, where senses come alive,
From bustling streets, a vibrant scene, to mountains reaching high.
A tapestry of cultures weave, in languages unknown,
With open hearts, the travelers receive, a kindness they have sown.
The compass spins, a lesson taught, not just where we may roam,
But self-discovery, dearly sought, a journey found in home.
For wanderlust unlocks the mind, with every winding trail,
A broader view, a heart more kind, a spirit that won't fail.